Morning Weigh In

eating disorderWeight: no loss nor gain
BP: 87/54 HR 52
Sleep: 3-hours tops

Not sure how I feel about the whole no loss or gain of weight; at best I’m conflicted over it. I know I need to stop or at least slow the weight loss and perhaps even put some back on, but my first reaction when I saw the numbers hadn’t changed was to make today a fasting day. I know I won’t do that, but thoughts of restricting did go through my mind.

I am most worried about my morning blood pressure reading than anything; it shows my blood pressure is crashing which isn’t uncommon for people whose bodies are entering or in starvation mode. That however isn’t the reason my crashing blood pressure is of a concern, my main concern is it means I won’t be able to take my nightmare medications. It also means I need to be a lot more careful when I stand up since I really don’t want to blackout in front of others and I am determined to make it to IOP today (having missed the past two days).

Oh well…life goes on; not sure I’m moving forward, backsliding, or running in place at the moment :/

Peace, love, and contentment,
Izzy

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